See that white tank-top in my last post's picture of me? Well, in doing laundry today I'm pretty sure I came up empty-handed in finding it. I think the travel monster ate it... and it was one of my favorites too! I think between my weekend excursions here and there lately, I left it in a hotel or something. Well, at least no one will see my white-tank yellow-underarm-'spots' anymore..... haha..... Maybe that's too much information? oh well..
Lately I've been pretty busy, and I think I actually need to take it down a notch. Between classwork, 2 jobs (one my grad appt. and one extra), new round of physical therapy for my hands 2x/week, and other misc. meetings for my thesis or whatever, and the treasurer obligations....... etc. etc.... I think I need to cut back a little somewhere. I think putting in so many extra hours at my jobs just for a little more $ is addicting, but not as appealing anymore now that the semester is in high gear; so, i think i'll be cutting back there a little. Additionally, I think i need to start prioritizing my time a little better and writing things down more often... I screwed up 2 professor meetings last week: one i wrote down the wrong time and the other i just completely missed somehow. I was so upset w/myself, esp. after the 2nd time. I think I need to take a deep breath and slow down; this way i'll feel as though the element of control is moving back my way. Plus, I've kinda lost some of my stamina in the evening hours, when i have the most time for reading and other schoolwork. I think the reason is partially that i spend virtually all day everyday on campus/at work that I'm totally spent when i get home and need to continue productivity. Secondly, I think not being able to run or workout asmuch for the last 2 months has kinda sucked, thereby draining my physical health to a small, but significant daily degree. I actually ran for the first time this weekend on my healing foot (the one i dropped a weight on in late August, and was told 'it's probably not broken' but had to stay off of, nevertheless endure daily soreness). It was SO nice, but i had to be careful to ease back into it- both for my foot AND my lungs... I could tell i hadnt run in a while... sadly. Running has always made me de-stress and have more overall energy- so i'm glad to be back, even at a minimal level.
Ultimately, my body has given me some difficulties as usual, and i've had to work with it and around it. Perhaps acceptance of limits and 'saying no' not to others but oneself is the lesson here. I also think being aware of yourself and your body are key; hopefully my recent awakening of little things, like missing appts. has woken me up.
I'm sure other people can relate to these kinds of things, so hopefully that all made sense. I did type it pretty fast and with little editing.
This thursday is my first real midterm exam--- already! How did that happen so fast?? In any case, I'm pretty sure i'll be ready because i've been keeping up pretty well in that class and have enjoyed it so far. Immediately after that, however, (and timed around a slight mental break after midterms) I'm takin a little trip up to the twin cities to visit family. It's purely a family visit, unlike some of my 'recent' trips home, which have had purposes like attending a wedding or event. Nope- this one's vacay and family time. I really miss being home, having a real fall where the weather's cooler, and just being around familar surroundings. However, as with many of my visits home, there's always an element of apprehension. My family has gone through alot in the last 2 years or so especially (and that's an extremely conservative number in the grand scheme of things), and relationships in my immediate family are still often very rocky. Going home means alot of things to me: comfort & discomfort, happiness & sadness, joy & anger, and much more. Just clicking 'purchase' on the online airfare site, solidifying the fact that i'm going for a visit, i have to admit, was a wee-bit emotional in some deep internal way. To my close family members and friends who keep up w/my blog and the events of my and my family's lives-- we, my family, still have a long way to go. Some members, one in particular, don't quite understand that, and I'm often afraid that that person won't ever understand that, and miss the last boat, whenever it comes. More on this some other day. This is a start for me on this public form in my personal goal to be more honest.
In other news, I have started very preliminarily looking around for jobs, post-graduation (ahhh!!!!). I found a couple at the Art Institute of Chicago that I think i'd really like, but it's still very prelim interest and findings. My concern w/those positions is that they wouldnt want to wait for me to graduate in May, but who knows? Can't hurt to apply!! Guess I better start writing my cover letters and updating my dusty resume!
Shout-out: To Laura. My favorite FBI hopeful who just passed the Secret Service exam! congrats!!! :)
-c
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